Here is the lesson I learned this weekend.
If something does not involve me....I will not get myself involved.
If I am involved in something right now that does not directly affect me, I am getting un-involved. Immediatly.
Not a very nice post, I know. But it wasn't a very nice sunday night either. One that has ended with me being angry and my daughter being upset because she was accused of something SHE DID NOT DO.
I am not a perfect person. I make mistakes. I am trying to live my life with more happiness, more peace, more caring, and yes, more heart. What there is left of it anyway.
Tonight I have learned this lesson. I do not always handle things the way they should be handled. Hell, 9 times out of 10, I'll screw it up. So, if you need me...tell me. and then tell me exactly what it is that you need me to do. Because if you don't, I will find a way to screw it up and only end up hurting both of us. It isn't intentional. I'm pretty sure it's because I have lived most of my life trying to convince people (and yes, myself) that nothing bothers me. That i am strong enough not to need anyone else. that i can handle almost everything alone. I don't know why i've done this and i dont care. it is what it is. But...I am pretty sure it has prevented me from learning what the right thing to do is in some situations. I don't seem to know anything about those "politically correct" people skills most people have, because i would very rarely let anyone behind the wall to learn from them. and i dont expect to have them any time soon.
So for now...I'm gonna keep my head down and my mouth shut, because really, I don't have the strength right now to do anything different.
2 comments:
JoAnn,
I've read this post over and over. I really think last week's was much funnier:)
All kidding aside, I hope you are doing better. I miss the wit and sarcasm you write your stories with. You are a good person and we go through different stages in our lives. Whatever it was that you did, I'm guessing you did it for Heather. Whose to say that it wasn't the RIGHT or PC thing to do?
I'm thinking of you.
Just because people don't always like what you have to say, doesn't mean you shouldn't get involved- especially in regards to close friends & family. But if the person doesn't want to deal with reality yet and is going to receive the information "like a fart in church" as Dan would say, then prepare yourself for the lashing out and move on. Gather strength for round 2 or figure out if you've done the best you can for now.
You did the right thing & I hope you would do the same for me; looking the other way, in my opinion is much more harmful to everyone. Oh yeh, you do just fine with the PC thing when you need to, you're just more sincere & fun when you're not (PC). JZ
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